Return Soldier: How to Surrender the War Part 1- Motives

This post is dedicated to all the wounded soldiers out there. The people that have been to hell and back and still can’t understand what the hell is wrong with their lives. The people that have done all they know to do to solve their problems yet things got worse and worse to their despair. They have gone up and down to find answers and got none, journeyed far and wide in the spirit and still found themselves stuck. Yeah i’m talking to those that have joined one religious movement or other, hoped from church to church, maybe even started their own church- Yet things got worse if they didn’t stay the same! Welcome to this post my return soldiers!

Image Courtesy of


People go to war for all kinds of reasons but always at the core- it is to defend territory under threat of attack/seizure or to take back territory possessed by the enemy. As humans we are spirit beings living a physical life in a physical world. In the journeys of the spirit being i.e the innerman, there are wars fought too for the same reasons. These spiritual wars take place in what are called battles of the mind. Self- introspection, self-inquiry or soul-searching are some of the terms that can be used to describe these wars and battles therein. But why is it that one can put so much effort to get answers and direction but get nothing in return? Why does life have to be so complicated? In some cases people seek and talk to God to the extent that they feel his presence yet in the natural world nothing seems to make sense. This problem affects men of cloth as much as it does an ordinary person on the street. Infact it is the sole reason why some people will never come to church or open their hearts to the ‘church thing’. Yet the means to a place of fulfillment and wisdom is one. Well the answer to this puzzle is simple and yet complicated. In life the wrong effort will never bring back home the right results. Add to that- the wrong motive! It is much like drinking beer and waking up with the same old problems and no solutions. Why? getting drunk will not address the issue ( wrong motive) and the beer is just a drink (wrong effort). So are all the other things people do to try and feel better. Religion amongst other copying mechanisms has much been used as a beer. Yes! That is what most people have done much to their disappointment and failure. In the war, if one doesn’t hit the target they will soon become the victim of the target. The target, who is the opposing force is also out to complete a mission. Dog eat dog! Survival of the fittest! Are you conditioned to take the hit and riseUP like a conqueror?

In my years of counselling, one thing i have found in common with people who come to seek answers is that they sought answers already but didn’t get the ‘right ones’ or at least validation for their opinions. Ofcourse their situation kept getting worse. Then again i observe that they did not get the right answers because they took off with the wrong motive, obviously that led them into the wrong efforts and wasted time. Sometimes people seek a listening ear and thats it! They don’t want to hear anything from you except that you have given them your time and they have emptied their baggage on you. Sad thing about baggage is that it has relatives and even friends and connections in high places. They know where you stay and how to get in your space again as a gang. Baggage also knows and understands where it belongs and specifically that emptying it out of the bin isn’t cleaning the bin or plucking the roots . Sooner or later the roots will shoot up and they will call for friends, brothers and cousins (rot multiplies). They will definately fill up that rotten bin that knows no actual cleaning or maintance and the state of that house (you) will be worse. So what then is the right motive?

Right Motive

When life hits a wrong foot way too long and nothing seems to make sense, its always time to ask questions. There must always be a reason why questions are asked so that one can get clear direction afterwards. Before you ask the questions, you must have a clear picture of why you are asking and who you are going to ask. It could be a self -introspection or a chat with a friend or even professional help with a counsellor.

Some of the most common Reasons for asking questions:

  • …because everything is just wrong
  • …need to understand
  • …answers to problems
  • …nothing is working
  • …things don’t make sense
  • …need a listening ear
  • …theres no progreess
  • …Cycles of misfortune

These motives are unfortunately part of the problem. They are for people going nowhere slowly and eventually people can lose it as frustration and confusion threaten their own sanity. Those that pose these kinds of reasons for their inquiry are not even prepared to know the truth. They are just cowards and usually they look for someone or something to blame because they themselves must remain in control. If not to blame but obtain validation for something they already onow is not the right thing to do but feels right. The truth of the matter is if you are already lost and confused what sort of control do you still have and what answer do you think you will get from yourself? The danger of asking other people is that they are only as informed as their experiences and lives. You are on a different lane and chances are your own experiences won’t match their proposed explanations or solutions. However, with the right motive this can be a good start. Have you ever wondered why in a church full of people receiving the same teaching, you will find people marred with all kinds of setbacks and probably just a handful experiencing the benefit of those teachings. The problem is not the preaching, teaching or the word…it is the mismatch between people & their motives and the preaching. What makes asking questions without a motive and/or a good one bad is that as spirit beings having an earthly experience, our fellow beings on the opposition side are quick to respond to our confused inquiring mind with supposed answers and feelings of comfort from all the crying that so often accompanies such inquiries. We mistake it for a ‘God and Us’ event, no wonder we get unpleasantly surprised that things haven’t changed and the mountain we are trying to level is well over our heads obstructing us as usual from making the progress we so yearn for, getting worse even!

From the above we can conclude that:

  1. Continuous exposure to unanswered questions with no motive is a soul damaging exercise
  2. Knowing what one wants to achieve from the questions will help craft the right motive and shape the right efforts for positive outcomes
  3. The Source of the answers must be determined before attempting to ask.

It is undeniable that when one reaches a hard place in life, they yearn, long and wish for a time when positive energy flows and things just work. Troubles are heartbreaking and mind boggling. They steal joy and peace to a point where they threaten one’s sanity. Motives/reasons for asking questions such as those mentioned above will not bring peace or joy but infact threaten the very presence of these positive forces in one’s life. Therefore, in a quest to find answers to questions, the motives must be corrected and aligned with the desire to get freedom from bondage, obtain peace and joy and all the good things of life. There’s is a diference between a person that says, “I want to understand why i’m not married or why my mother abandoned me…why me…why is my life like this?” and one that says, ” I want to know what i can do to change my life and get better results, surely there is more to this life than what i see, i have to make it…” Although they may have the same background or unfortunate past, their motives in making inquiry set them apart. One is regressive, past focused and already being driven by negative energy while the other one is progressive, future focused and driven by positive energy and their results are going to be obviously different. May i mention that absence of a motive will result in a default motive being assumed or given by negative forces who inturn don’t waste time in offering their corresponding negative answers. Well there was a vacuum and it had to be filled! So 1) have a motive 2) make sure it’s a positive motive and finally 3) make sure the one you are asking has the answers.

Therefore, it is imperative as a Return Soldier to have a motive and not only that but make sure its the right motive. After that then comes the work of alignment with the right Efforts. Since we are now acquainted with wrong motives or absence of motive, join me in Part 2 as we examine the dynamics of surrender as the basis of right efforts which we will look at in part 3

Till then,

Ester H.


Falling is not the problem, failing to riseUP is!!!!!

1 thought on “Return Soldier: How to Surrender the War Part 1- Motives”

  1. Pingback: Return Soldier: How to Surrender the War Part 3-Efforts

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Open chat
Good day. How can we help you.